Even though I now know what “Yatta!” means, I still don’t understand what the fuck is going on in this video.

Greenleaf: YATTA

I love the great nation of Japan and all the marvels it has to offer, I honestly do. I mean, without the Land of the Rising Sun, we wouldn’t have modern day miracles like Nintendo, bukkake, fart sniffing fetishes, Toyota, Godzilla, and of course, tentacle rape. These are just a few things that I can’t live without. In the grand tradition of all of the above, comes YATTA, a song and dance craze from a group of middle-aged men wearing flesh colored underwear with little leaves over their private parts.

If you have an internet connection (which is highly likely if you are visiting this page) and like to visit e/n websites, then I am sure that you’ve already come across YATTA at one point or another. Like Carrot Top or Gary Coleman, it’s just one of those universally funny things that people, regardless of race, nation, color, or creed, enjoy.

But what makes YATTA so special? What separates it from being just a Japanese version of YMCA? Well that’s what I intend to find out today my friends, by reviewing Greenleaf’s ultra popular video.

The video has a sort of concert setup, where the members of Greenleaf perform in front of an audience that consists mostly of elderly people and little kids: not quite the people I’d expect to enjoy something so blatantly homosexual, but whatever floats your boat I suppose…

Interspersed all throughout the vid are the members at different locales doing the YATTA dance. Like it’s predecessors, the Macarena, YMCA, and the Achy Breaky, the YATTA consists of several moves performed in sequence. While I am not even going to begin to describe it, I will tell you that there are websites out there that will show you all the steps.

Also, the main move of the YATTA dance consists of standing on one leg with your arms positioned in the “field goal” position. If all of the previous stuff in this video wasn’t scary enough, the guys also do pelvic thrusts in front of a variety of backdrops, including the Taj Mahal, plates of sushi, and Tianamen Square.

The guys are also on a boat with a big ass painting of themselves. I think this was probably CG’ed, because I cannot imagine anybody being hired to paint the leaves that covered the crotches.

You all might wonder what YATTA means? Well, even though I took Japanese for two years, I still can’t make heads or tails of it, so aside from the broken engrish in the song, I can’t make out much. From what I can tell though, it appears that YATTA means that when life gives you lemon, make lemonade. If times are bad, just grin and move on.

Oh yeah, the word HOPE was also superimposed over a leaf from one of the guy’s crotches. That’s a big clue to what this mess is all about.

Here’s a real funny scene from the video. One of the guys is walking down the street and sees a pretty girl. Of course she laughs at him and walks away. Sad, he is consoled by another Greenleaf member. Then they do the YATTA dance together.

Hey pal, here’s a tip, put on some freakin’ normal clothes. And stop hanging around the other Greenleafers. I didn’t want to say this, but people will talk if you dress like that and hang around with a bunch of other men who do the same. Trust me. I mean, look at 98 Degrees.

Overall, YATTA isn’t too bad. It’s one of those quirky things that makes life more enjoyable. While I can’t say that YATTA is an instant classic to be adored through the ages, I can say that it’s a good escape from the trials of everyday life. I could have went on and on bashing this video, but I’ve learned alot from it.

Oh, it is also very gay.

Score: 3.9

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