It’s been quite a while since I’ve done anything about Voltron. I had a whole bunch of old episodes laying around that I’ve been meaning to review, but for some reason or another, I just haven’t gotten around to it. Until today of course.

I don’t know if the majority of you guys know the general background info of Voltron or not, so a quick brief for the benefits of those that don’t. The Voltron Force was a group of five heroes who piloted big robotic cats and fought an evil alien emperor who resembled a big fish.

Voltron: Secret of the White Lion

It’s been quite a while since I’ve done anything about Voltron. I had a whole bunch of old episodes laying around that I’ve been meaning to review, but for some reason or another, I just haven’t gotten around to it. Until today of course.

I don’t know if the majority of you guys know the general background info of Voltron or not, so a quick brief for the benefits of those that don’t. The Voltron Force was a group of five heroes who piloted big robotic cats and fought an evil alien emperor who resembled a big fish.

Whenever they got in trouble, they could combine themselves into the ultimate warrior. No, not the Ultimate Warrior that tied ribbons around his arms and went crazy in the squared circle, but Voltron, Defender of the Universe. You can probably find out alot more on the net, or if you’re lazy, just read my first article about Voltron.

I chose Secret of the White Lion to review today because I feel it’s a good example of the postives, and the negatives, that existed within this series. Voltron doesn’t really hold up as well today as compared to some other cartoons from that era, and it can get pretty stupid at times. And that’s saying alot since the original Masters of the Universe series aired during this time.

The show opens up with Hagar, a witch working for the King Zarkon, comes up with a plan to defeat the Voltron Force. You see, Allura, a Voltron pilot and princess, has lost her father recently. To capitalize on this, Hagar will make Allura have dreams about her parents. Hagar will then create an illusion so Allura will think that a white lion is her father, back from the dead to help guide Allura in ruling the kingdom.

Everything is going according to Hagar’s plan, and the Princess starts chasing after a white lion into the forests. The guards try to stop her, but she’s too intent on being with her dead father that she doesn’t even pay them any attention.

That’s not a big surprise, because they are absolutely useless. Whenever Zarkon and Co. show up, all they do is run around and call for Voltron. Makes me wonder why they even bothered to hire guards in the first place. Maybe it was one of those traditional things that isn’t necessary, but everybody is so used to it, they don’t want to see it changed?

Back at the castle, the head maid (?) starts going berserk because Allura left without any warning, and starts waking everybody up. The Voltron Force decides that they gotta go rescue the Princess right away, or else the fat bitch won’t ever shut up, not because they really wanted too. I think Hunk wanted to eat a steak though.

The Voltron Force shows up and tries to convince Allura that the white lion isn’t her reincarnated father, and that she was having a bad dream. I think Lance also suggests that Hagar might have something to do with this.

Allura won’t hear any of this though, and tries to protect the lion when the other VF members try to attack it. Taking advantage of the ensueing chaos, the white lion springs to action and manages to capture all of the Voltron Force, except for Keith, the guy in red.

Things look grim for our heroes. Hagar and the white lion (who’s in more of a humanoid form now) tie up everyone and crucified Princess Allura. She’s no Jesus. Keith does attempt to rescue them, but the white lion chases him off. All hope seems lost…

Enter the Chancellor and the maid piloting the Blue Lion. While they have no clue what they are really doing, they manage to push a lever that shoots a stream of water at Hagar. Unfortunately, she doesn’t melt like a normal witch should, but she does ends up getting washed away. The Voltron Force is then free, ready to take control of the lions.

They attack the white lion, who just got “biggie sized” by King Zarkon. If you ever watched Power Rangers, than you should be pretty familiar with the general plot of every single episode Voltron: moster attacks, heroes fight it, monster becomes gigantic, heroes unite to form a big bad ass that kills the monster with one shot. It’s a tried and true formula that appears every so often in shows for kids.

One thing different about this episode though is that Allura still thinks of the white lion as her father… er… mother. (I’m sure something was lost in the translation.) She hesitates and gets captured, but only for a bit though. She soon realizes that all of it was a trick, and then this happens:

TA DA!!! I’m pretty sure you can figure out what happened after this. Voltron came and got his laser sword or whatever and blew the monster up with it. How he blew up a monster with a sword…

Secret of the White Lion was one of the weaker episodes of the Voltron series. The story was decent, but poorly executed. If anything, it made fans of the series hate Allura more than they already did, because she was worthless in it. And yet, it does have all of the things that made us love Voltron so much. What those are, I don’t know… I just don’t know…

Score: 5.7

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