I was going to sit down and try to type up a music video review tonight, in honor of the death of the VMAs and MTV, but I decided to fire up the Punisher arcade game instead.

I was going to sit down and try to type up a music video review tonight, in honor of the death of the VMAs and MTV, but I decided to fire up the Punisher arcade game instead… and let me tell you, I probably made the right call.

The Punisher was one of those side-scrolling brawlers in the vein of Final Fight made by Capcom. Games like these were all the rage back in the early 90s. In fact, I’d say that at one time, this was the most popular genre of arcade games until Street Fighter 2 and the whole fighting game thing blew up. Now-a-days, I think people only go to arcades to play DDR.

Wait. Is Dance Dance Revolution still popular? I haven’t been to an arcade in years, so DDR could have gone out of style. If so, what has replaced it?

At any rate, back in the early 90s, the Punisher was the fucking shit. Anti-heroes were all the rage in comic books and the Punisher’s books sold really well. I mean, back then, we had Dolph-mother-fuckin’-Lundgren in a Punisher movie. Now, Thomas Jane. I didn’t even know who Thomas Jane was until someone reminded me it was the guy who wasn’t LL Cool J in the movie with intelligent sharks.

Also, I really miss the old Capcom Marvel games. There were a ton of great side-scrolling beat ‘em ups and of course the fighting games; Marvel vs. Capcom 2 is still one of my favorite games of all time. I hope that one day these 2 companies will get back together… to make Marvel Vs. Capcom 3. (Most likely will never happen.)

If you have ever played Final Fight or Streets of Rage or Double Dragon, I’m sure you already can figure out what the gameplay of the Punisher is like. You can use a variety of weapons including swords and bats and a big lance. My favorite weapon is the flamethrower. The only thing that stands out is that at times you can use a gun… and quite frankly, the gun sucks.

I wasn’t paying really close attention to what was going on in the game because I was just randomly hitting buttons, but the Punisher and Nick Fury, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., are on a mission to take down the King Pin. Apparently, there going to do it with bad grammar. It’s nothing you couldn’t finished in 30 minutes. I wish I had someone to play this with since these kind of games are a lot more fun with 2 players… but I am a lonely sad man who’s angry all the time and enjoys playing 14 year old games.

And girls.

Har har har.

Just kidding about the first one.

The only reason to beat arcade games…

Score: 5.5

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