“It’s showtime Synergy!”

Sorry for not updating recently guys. I know it seems every other one of my posts start this way… but I had a legit reason. Honest. (Just moved into a new place…) So here’s one of my hastily written posts from my old website. The screencaps were from a shitty video, but I embedded a youtube video so that you could enjoy Jem and the Holograms in all of their glory.

Being the manly man that I am, I am not afraid to talk about topics that other male webmasters might shy away from. I’m just bursting with so much heterosexual energy, that even when I do stuff like write homoerotic fanfictions about Street Fighter or make sweet love to myself, that my adoration for the ladies just shines through.

Don’t worry, I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about either. I think it’s been this way for the past two years. And yet, I continue writing…

One cartoon that a lot of guys have watched in the late 80s, but would probably never admit doing so, is the ultra-fantasicmagic series, Jem and the Holograms. Even though it was targeted at young girls, a lot of people from both sexes enjoyed this series.

I was going to do a review of an entire episode of Jem today, but I honestly could not find any complete episodes that aren’t dubbed in French. Apparently, the French share a similar love for our pink-haired goddess. So instead, I’ll review my favorite video by the quartet, Truly Outrageous.

A little background story on Jem. The show revolves around a group of glamrock girls. The leader of the group is Jem of course. She has all these powers from a hologram generating device that she controls using her earings. No really she does. I don’t remember all of the detail surrounding the show, but I believe that the hologram machine was supposed to be an incarnation of her mother. I’d go look all of this info up, but I think it’s more fun when I do these articles based purely on what I remember… even though I might be wrong.

Anyway, before she becomes Jem, Jerrica is just your mild-mannered hot blonde cartoon chick with a butt that just won’t quit. Whenever she’s in trouble, or if she feels like rocking out, she touches her earrings and says the magic words:

“It’s showtime Synergy!”

And bam! She’s Jem, leader of one of the biggest rockbands on the face of the earth. The plots in this series normally revolved around Jem and the Holograms winning one of the many battle of the band competitions they enter, foiling the evil plans of the Misfits, or Jem trying to get Rio in the sack.

At any rate, interspersed throughout each episode were “music videos” performed by either the Holograms or the Misfits. They range from being totally radical to completely bogus. In the case of Truly Outrageous, it was totally radical.

Throughout the video, there are alot of girly images. You know, like unicorns, balloon rides, rainbows, tampons, etc. Truly Outrageous was used in several episodes, so I don’t know what they’re particular refering to as being “truly outrageous” in this video.

Meet the rest of the Holograms. I don’t remember any of their names. I’d be willing to bet that they’re more diverse than 99% of the rockbands out there. I mean… when was the last time you saw a girl with pink-hair, one with red, another with purple, and one with blue get along outside of maybe some anime? Oh yeah, the purple haired chick was black and the blue haired one was Asian. The red might have been Latino, but I am not certain about that. I kinda tuned her out because she was my least favorite. She was known for saying “outrageous!!!” approximately every 10 seconds.

And here was the foo that Jem lusted after, Rio AKA Big FaGgos. Personally I never don’t know what Jem saw in the guy, but I suppose I shouldn’t being the manly man that I am. See, he had the whole Lois Lane syndrome; Rio really liked Jem… but he also really liked Jerrica. He didn’t know that one was the other, so instead, he thought he was a ladies’ man by hooking up with both of them.

If I was Jem, Superman, Spiderman, and so on and so on, I’d be kind of upset. I mean, here’s this person who’s supposed to like me for who I am, and then all of a sudden some guy comes along (that’s really you) that can fly and shit, and your other is all over that them. What gives?! It does make a good plot for a romantic comedy though, doesn’t it?

Like I said earlier, this video was easily one of the best on the show (right above Gimme Gimme). While I wouldn’t go out and by the cd and drool over them if they were on MTV, I’d have to say it was pretty kickin’ rad for what it was. So yeah, it was truly outrageous. HAR HAR HAR. I made a funny. :-(

Score: 6.1

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