Jang Nara loves to hang out with a panda and do kung fu and sing in Mandarin Chinese. I don’t understand what is going on either.

Long time visitors of my site know that I used to be really really into Asian pop music videos. For some reason, during that part of my life, it really appealed to me. It could have been the hot hot girls, the gigantic retardation (I know that’s not a real word… but it should be…) in the videos, or the fact that the music wasn’t really that bad…

…

Bahahahhaha.

Okay it was all because of the superfine honeys. But I mean, can you blame me? These girls were either just smoking hot or too fuckin’ cute.

I really don’t know how or why, but Korean pop music seems to be all over the place now. Hell, Taylor Townsend herself is a big fan. It defies logic, since most kpop sites suck dick and visiting shitholes like that would actually drive me away from watching Asian music videos… but I digress.

One of my favorite Korean stars was always Jang Nara. She’s unbelievably cute and I just want to give her a nice big hug and pinch her cheeks. And then I would want to defile her in unspeakable ways that couldn’t even be categorized as “sex” anymore. Oh yeah, Jang Nara, if you’re reading this, send the big daddy a message and I will do things to you that no man, except for maybe the Japanese or the Germans, have ever dreamed of.

I was really surprised when I first saw this video on youtube. I just randomly searched for “Jang Nara” and up popped this video of her singing in Mandarin and being all tough and shit. Let’s take a look at the video shall we…

The video opens up with Jang Nara and a panda being all buddy buddy. From what I can tell, they live in a temple where they practice kung fu. Jang Nara has also donned a very Chun Li-esque costume. I don’t know if this is because she’s a cosplayer or not, but she should really think about getting into that. It’d be the ultimate entertainer trifecta; actress - singer - otaku masturbation material.

But yeah, some group decides to kidnapp Jang Nara’s panda buddy and she now has to be a bad enough dude to rescue her panda friend.

By the way, have you guys seen that panda sneeze video? It was on my roommates desktop for some reason. I made fun of him for having it on his computer but then I secretly went to my room and watched it 30 times in a row. SUPERKAWAAIIII!!!

The first guy Jang Nara encounters is some dude with in blackface. She easily handles this guy with the Spinning Bird kick. Yatta!

Oh, the video is about half real life actors/ half animation, but Jang Nara does manage to kick really high in some places. It’s done real well and definitely a nice change of pace from everything else out there.

Then all of a sudden she decides to switch into her workout clothes. I’ve been reviewing these videos for about 6 years now; and I am not even going to pretend to understand why she would want to do this. I would have definitely stuck with the Chun Li outfit if for nothing else the intimidation factor. Seriously, over the years, we’ve been trained to think “Holy shit this girl is going to lightning kick the ever living shit out of me” whenever we see that costume.

Here’s the main villain that kidnapped the panda. I don’t know what the grim reaper would want to do with a panda, especially since they are all going to be extinct pretty soon, but like I said in the last paragraph, I really have no idea why anything happens in any of these videos. I just try to explain what is going on and provide commentary. Sometimes I’ll write out an entire review before I even know what video I am going to watch and just add the pictures later. I’ve been doing this for years and I am really surprised no one had busted me for it.

At any rate, it’s obvious what is going to happen. Jang Nara manages to beat the grim reaper and is once again reuinited with the panda. They go on to live happily ever after. Yay!

Score: 7.0